In my state, we have little to no waste in state government. We are lean and six-sigma’d out the wazoo.
That’s why, apparently, we pay our state agency directors to make decisions like, “This PowerPoint that the training guy made has some emoji in it. Should it? Should it have emoji, Director? Please take the paid time to consider this question and issue a final decision.”
And then the state agency director (who reports directly to the governor) takes the paid time to consider the question and issue a final decision.
I picked up a souvenir during our trip. It’s called a Buddha Board. You use water to paint on it like a canvas. The water causes the strokes you make to darken and appear. Slowly, as the water dries, the marks disappear. Impermanence and presence. A gimmick? Sure. But it’s a clever, calming one.
A parade of nazis took to the streets in my town yesterday. Our governor and our neoliberal, useless mayor issued worthless statements of condemnation. If you’re a member of a marginalized or minority American community, I suggest you get a safety plan in place.
Here are some scenarios I just brainstormed.
If something happens and we need a short term temporary place to stay in town away from our home address
If something happens and we need a longer term place to stay in town away from our home address
If something happens and we need to temporarily leave town
If something happens and we need to leave town for an extended period
If something happens and we need to physically go into hiding
If one of us gets injured or attacked
If both of us get injured or attacked
If one of us should be killed
If both of us should be killed
If our marriage is undone by the government
If our house is raided by the government
If we are anonymously reported to the government
If one of us is imprisoned
If both of us are imprisoned
If literature we own becomes banned
If artwork we own becomes banned
If films we own become banned
If homosexuality becomes criminalized
If atheism becomes criminalized
If a friend is harassed
If a friend is injured or attacked
If a friend is killed
If a family member is harassed
If a family member is injured or attacked
If a family member is killed
If a friend reports us
If a family member reports us
If a neighbor reports us
If a coworker reports us
If public dissent becomes criminalized
If internet use becomes censored or monitored
If social media is closely monitored
If iOS app usage is closely monitored
How will we communicate with trusted individuals
How will we communicate with untrusted individuals
How will we stay informed
Who do we trust
Who don’t we trust
Get passports
Get cash money out of the bank
Get important documents printed and vaulted
Cancel unnecessary accounts and online profiles
Submit data deletion requests
Get VPNd
Get non-US based email addresses
Get encrypted messaging apps
Get encrypted note taking apps, calendar apps, password apps, etc
Severely limit professional and nonprofessional relationships with known or suspected conservatives
One ringy dingy
Two ringy dingies
¡click!
Hello. The Democratic Party is either away from its phone, or on another line. Please leave a message.
¡beep!
We’re sorry. This mailbox is full. Please try again later.
Mom asked for Christmas gift ideas for me and Michael, so I emailed some ideas. A vinyl Tori Amos album. Gift cards. A nice pair of over-the-head headphones for Michael.
Then I got a little bit tacky, and a whole lot real.
I’m highly concerned that my job will be up for elimination soon, I said in the email. If any gifts are given, cash would be the most helpful to us at this point.
🚨🚨House Bill 445 will force Ohio Schools to adopt an RTRI “Release Time for Religious Instruction” policy. 🚨🚨
This opens the door WIDE for predatory organizations like Lifewise Academy (See Parents Against Lifewise) to infiltrate our public schools with Evangelical Christian Nationalist Rhetoric. Tonight is the deadline to submit opposition testimony to this bill. We have until 11 am today!
To submit written testimony on HB 445 you must:
Download and fill out this witness form www.
I keep reading about “polarization” and I just don’t get it. What could possibly be polarizing? Maybe if I think really hard I’ll be able to figure it out.
In the meantime, here’s a completely random list of non-partisan words and phrases randomly listed in random order and that have nothing to do with anything anywhere at all.
Elected Felon Convicted felon Impeached Impeached Musk Twitter X Billionaire Immigrant South Africa $132 Million Government Contract Promises Lies Economy “Novus Ordo Seclorum” Puppet Tariffs 10% 20% 60% Tax Consumers Promises Lies That’s not how tariffs work Price increases Consumer borne Actress Wife Divorce Dead Immigrant Wife Divorce Dead Buried Golf course Immigrant Wife Nude Absent Notably absent God Man of god Gold Man of gold Gold sneakers Sold Old Older Oldest Oldest man ever 78 Years old Savior Cult Cultist Christian Christian value Christian values Christian democracy Deportation Mass deportation Mass deportation now 20 Million deportations Private prisons Empty beds $400 million more annually Stock market Stock prices Soaring Unprecedented opportunity Cost $88 Billion $315 Billion Taxes Taxpayers Who pays for it?
🤐 Here’s a completely random list of non-partisan words and phrases randomly listed in random order and that have nothing to do with anything anywhere at all.
I saw an Asshole.
There he was, this Asshole, right there in the airport. Standing there, puckering all over the place where anyone could see, and in the same queue of people as us.
The Asshole was small. Short and stout like in the little teapot song, but not at all a teapot.
The Asshole was more like a half melted, hard, clear, plastic beer pitcher. A clear, plastic beer pitcher filled with shit and lit on fire by some country hick who thinks it’s hilarious to fart and shit on anything good or decent or clean, and who’s got nothing else useful to do.
I can’t wait to say “I told you so” to every single one of them at the exact moment it hurts them the most. I am sorry I’m not above that. Right now I do not even wish to be. I have no desire for compassion. I have no energy for it. I have no capacity for it. All I taste is bitter indifference.