This week we spent some time at the ER. And by “some time” I mean almost a full work day’s worth of time. Michael was in the waiting room for about 7-hours, and me with him for about 6. It was hot, it was crowded, people were grumpy, and I was one of them. The dude at the front desk, who I tried really hard to not direct my anger towards (because it wasn’t frustration - it was anger…6 hours worth of increasingly angry anger) rolled his eyes at me when I told him he should escalate to his supervisor that a 7 hour wait wasn’t acceptable. We talked to a patient advocacy guy later and he basically had the same crap to say. 🙄
Columbus Free Press posted the piece I wrote on their website (This law doesn’t protect kids. It punishes them). They followed up:
Excellent stuff here Matthew. This is associate editor <name>, and managing editor <name> also agrees, you have talent with the pen. …we have been looking for a regular LGBTQ+ columnist/reporter for some time and would love for you to keep submitting to us.
I’ve hesitated to ever call myself a “writer” although people have complimented my writing in the past. It just always felt like that title was reserved for published authors, or reporters, or essayists, or novelists, or anybody else but me. This compliment and kind offer (from the kind of people who work with “real” writers) made me think maybe being a “writer” - a real one, even - isn’t so far out of my reach after all.
My therapist asked me to try a couple exercises this week. One was to listen to anything but political news updates in the shower, and the other was to spend time each day envisioning my future - my Movie B - through the lens of believing in myself, liking myself, etc.
For the first, I downloaded an app called Endel and used it every day while I showered (except one day when I listened to Pet Shop Boys). I noticed an almost immediate difference in my daily outlook. One morning I even found myself kind of dancing in the shower…to Pet Shop Boys.
For the second, I’d spend time imagining a future - 1 week out, a year out, 5 years out - and write out the kinds of behaviors I’d be observing. They were all positive, of course, and somehow by writing them down, they also feel like they aren’t so far out of my reach after all.
Highlights from the Week
📺 Stranger Things; Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt; 30 Rock; What We Do In The Shadows; 30 Rock; Dracula; Pushing Daisies; Cunk on Earth; Man on the Inside; High Potential
🍿 Cunk on Life (2024); Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief (2015)
📚 Tori Amos’s Boys for Pele (33 ⅓) by Amy Gentry
🍽️ Jeni’s Splendid Ice Cream; Press Grille
🎧 Kate Bush; Tori Amos; 50 Foot Wave; The Last Five Years Soundtrack; Matthew Herbert; Mara Carlyle; Michel’le; Pet Shop Boys; Liz Phair; Siouxsie & The Banshees; Yo-Yo; Neko Case; Pinback; Tricky
📰 Letters from an American; everyone is entitled to my own opinion; The Rooster
🙏 Michael’s health; Movie-B; saltine crackers
⚕️Submitted final assessment related to Autism Spectrum Disorder screening; attended virtual & in-person SMART Recovery meetings
