4/7/2025 EDIT: Replaced unprofessional name calling with asterisks; updated to include response from IT Director.
This wasn’t a fun week at work, and it culminated on Friday with an email from our * IT Director to me, and my response to it.
I asked for a particular app subscription to be purchased (about a $500 purchase) and then installed. Started the process maybe two weeks ago. Our purchasing process is, to say the least, stupid. Like, I’ve worked there for two years and I don’t have a single goddamned idea how to purchase flip chart paper. I literally don’t know who to go to or talk to or email. Purchasing software is, to say the least, even stupider than purchasing flip chart paper. No matter.
Actually, yes matter.
I filled out the form the way I thought I was supposed to. I sent it to my division chief. She approved it and sent it to fiscal. They approved it and contacted me to log in to the website, pull up the subscription page, and allow them to put in the payment/credit card info and make the purchase. I allowed them and put in a ticket to have the software, which you may recall my boss had approved, and the fiscal office had approved, and the fiscal office paid for. IT answered the ticket, and assigned it to the IT guy who installed the software. Great.
Except not great.
The next day, Friday, I got an email from our * IT Director raking me over the coals. She told me that I didn’t follow the right process as had been previously shared with me (and attached a pdf). She said the software was not an approved software, and that I was in violation of two policies, and put the enterprise’s data at risk (which is bullshit - I make soft skill training videos not Medicare enrollments, and she’s an *). But she didn’t just email me. Oh, no. She did the whole, “I’m going to rake this guy over the coals, and I’m going to make sure everyone knows it so I’m going to carbon copy his boss, the chief fiscal officer, the IT guy who installed the software, the supervisor of the IT guy who installed the software, and the shared email box for the entire IT department’s Helpdesk staff. And I’m going to do it because I can. Also I’m a *.”
I’m a nice guy. Generally, I’m also a good guy. I give people the benefit of the doubt and I’m usually the first person to fall on my sword. Unless you’re a * who lambasts me in front of other people for no other reason than to make yourself feel powerful. Because when you do that, I write back. And here’s what I say:
<IT Director Name>,
The form I completed went to my division chief, who approved and forwarded it to Fiscal, who contacted me to pay for it, so I let them pay for it, having very logically assumed everything was done that needed to be done because why else would we be paying for it.
I am feeling quite defensive over your message because it feels like I’m being lectured to. I feel like sending an email of this nature to five people and a shared mailbox is belittling and humiliating. And I don’t deserve that.
Not bothering to come to me or my supervisor directly and/or individually to grant me the opportunity to course-correct is unwelcome and unfair.
As a matter of communicating my needs and how I would prefer to be treated, I would appreciate the kind courtesy of being addressed privately or with my supervisor if I do something that is “not in alignment with the directions provided to me” or is “out of compliance.”
<IT Guy> can remove whatever [app] he needs to, but this ridiculous nightmare of a purchasing & software installation process is burdensome, cumbersome, confusing, under-documented, and deserves attention, clearer instruction, and vast streamlining. And _that _isn’t my fault.
A colleague whom I’d looped into may reply came to check on me. She told me IT Director needs to learn how to talk to people; that IT Director had been snippy with her that very morning as well.
My boss, who I know was only trying to help, in so many words told me I was overreacting, and that we should talk more about it Monday when I’m in a better frame of mind. I said there’s nothing else to talk about. I said IT Director doesn’t get to treat me that way, or talk to me that way. And that I’m not going to let her walk all over me. That I’m done.
And as of eight o’clock on Sunday night, I’m still done.
_____ UPDATE: IT Director replied to my email with an apology and clarified her intention. I replied thanking her and said I’m ready to move forward. I feel a bit sheepish but also not.
***
Highlights
📺 Watching
Follow me on Trakt: https://trakt.tv/users/wireddifferently
Check back next week
🍿 Viewing
Follow me on Trakt: https://trakt.tv/users/wireddifferently
Check back next week
📚 Reading
Check back next week
🍽️ Eating
Check back next week
🎧 Listening
Follow me on Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/profile/WiredDifferently
Check back next week
📰 Scanning
Follow me on SubStack: https://substack.com/@wireddifferently
Check back next week
🙏 Thanking
- Standing up for myself to an IT imbecile who couldn’t find her way out of a server closet if she tried
- Seeing my favorite band rock out in a 100+ year old theater
- Dinner with a dear friend and his partner
🩺 Healing
Check back next week
